On Anonymous hate

I would like to take a moment to express my pity for the people who feel the need to exploit these anonymous question websites through sending hate. Something so innocent with potential to truly boost a person’s self confidence is instead being abused to engorge the egos of twisted young people who are yet unaware of how to gauge their own self-worth against anything but majority opinion. 

I would like to remind teenage girls that your beauty is not measured by the width of the gap between your thighs when you stand with your ankles together or the size of your breasts. I would like to remind you that there will be times when someone does not like you and that it will rarely ever be your fault because people are people and that in itself implies that they will be cruel to you but do not give it up. You will never be able to fit that tape measure around all the world of possibilities in your mind or weigh the love in your heart but that does not make these intangible possessions any less real, in fact if it does anything it makes it more so. Anyone, literally anyone with a brain in their cranium, can write something mean to you. Anyone with vocal chords and a bad experience can call you a bad name or use less than beautiful adjectives to try and make you feel inferior, but it takes a very good person to have belief in oneself. 

If you can believe in what you do as an individual, you will never need somebody else’s approval and because of this nobody’s disapproval will ever hurt you, so why do more people not believe in themselves? To be blunt, it is a terribly frightening idea! We have been born and raised in a world that measures worth in grades given to you on a test taken by thousands of strangers by someone you have never met and opinions expressed about you by people who may have never looked in your eyes as you chatter about something that you are passionate about. The concept that we can simply let this go is often too much for people. Change is frightening and there is no denying it, but if you begin to losen your grip, begin to unravel your cramped fingers from around the wrists of this poisonous and parasitic lover maybe you will finally see all the beauty around you.

As soon as you stop hating that girl for being thinner/smarter/nicer/flirtier/cuter/better/lovelier/dumber/sluttier than you want her to be and maybe you take a second look, maybe you’ll see the way she really pays attention in English and she really listens when you put your hand up to speak. So maybe next time you listen closer to hear what she has to say about that book that you love, maybe you notice that she liked that paragraph that you liked too, maybe you’re more similar than you think despite your narrow minded and self obsessed reasoning behind wanting to hurt her. 

I wish to send love to anyone receiving hateful messages and to anyone sending them, remembering Orin’s saying: 

“Everybody can use more love. Do not take offense if people are rude or unkind or seem like they are trying to hurt your feelings. You cannot know what is happening with them. Send them love no matter how they act. It will come back to you many times over as increased love in your life.”

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