After I checked, I knew I was right. You had moved from the place where
I had left you, you were no longer in the security of our home nor house.
A picture on a screen confirmed that you had shifted across the face of
the planet, so now I cannot pinpoint where you are on a map, I could not
name the country that you are in, you are whalesong in the depths, I know
you exist but I could not say whereabouts.
I wish I had written down the date that I last saw you, so that I could count
the hours since your eyes had last met mine and I had last felt that chill,
perhaps that woud make it more real for me, so my failing memory would
no longer feel quite so inept and fantastical, something concrete in this
smoky, cloudy dream world would aid my mental state to no end.
Knowing that even if you tried, your voice could never reach me from there
the way it usually does, the sounds of the past that had me convinced that
my future was you could never reach me from where you are. Sea waves
distort the sound and the ocean spray attacks the vibrations until all I hear
from you is the casual cruelty that you condone in the name of honesty and
the only thing I see through the haze are those eyes but they don’t make
I won’t sleep tonight because you are awake, irrelevant of the tides that separate and all the miles that disappear when I think of your face, there is a tie that cannot, will not be cut, and I will not sleep.